Tuesday, December 23, 2008

圣诞快乐

 那年你9岁,我7岁。你常常牵着我的小手,去附近的杂货店买巧可力糖。那种巧克力糖是我的最爱。香浓的巧克力,裹在五颜六色甜甜的糖衣里,有红的黄的蓝的青的橙的等等,一颗颗排列成8字形。而我喜欢把它当成眼镜在脸上比划着。你总是笑着摸摸我的头。你的笑容像是和熙的太阳。没有上课的午后,我们坐在篮球场的石凳子上,一边分享着巧克力糖,一边观看大哥哥大姐姐们打球,直到夕阳西下,才拖着长长的背影回家。
 那年你12岁,我10岁。检定考试结束后,你骑着新买的脚踏车来找我,说要带我去一个很棒的地方。我们沿着通往村后的那一条小路前进,经过一间又一间飘送着黄昏饭菜香味的菜园屋,转进一条崎岖不平的泥路。泥路两旁都是齐人高的芒草,在清风吹拂下缓缓的左摇右摆。拐了个弯,眼前豁然开阔,一大片湖水映入眼帘。那是一个很大很大的废矿湖,有着蓝绿色的湖水。湖中央有几处因长年累月的淤泥积沙堆成的小岛,生长着葱绿的灌木,上面歇息着许多水鸟。湖边有三三两两的村民在钓鱼。午后的清风掠过平静的湖面,泛起阵阵涟漪,惊动了徘徊在湖面上的蜻蜓。你推着脚踏车,静静的和我一同伫立在湖边,陶醉在怡人的景色里,让风轻轻的拂在脸上,吹动着头发,衣袖,裙摆。直到夕阳染红了湖水,才依依不舍的离开。
 那年你16岁,我14岁。我们就读于同一间国中,但课室却相隔两栋大楼。我最期待每学期家政课仅有的两堂烹饪实习。我总是很用心地依照老师的指示,弄出生平第一次亲手做的蛋糕甜甜圈燕菜布丁rendang鸡橙味炸鸡,然后在下课铃声响起时,迫不及待地捧着新鲜出炉的作品,去高年级的课室找你,让你品尝我的厨艺,也不管自己做的好不好吃。你还是像小时候一样笑着摸摸我的头,把便当盒揣在怀中。家政课不止有烹饪实习,也有木工实习。我对木工实习永远一筹莫展,木条无法锯成老师要的尺寸,钉子总是钉歪。上木工实习课时,你会假装不经意地路过木工室,趁着老师转身离开木工室,快速溜进来,卷起袖子接过我手中的锯子或铁槌,三两下就解决了我的难题,也顺道帮其他正在发愁的同学解围,再趁着老师快踏进木工室那一瞬间,在一片感激又欣赏的目光中离开。
 那年你18岁,我16岁。你离开了村子去外坡念书。临行前我送你一只亲手编织的蜻蜓锁匙扣。你说你会把它扣在你的摩托车匙上,就像载着我穿梭在异乡的街道上。那时候手机是遥不可及的梦想,我们只靠书信联系彼此,偶尔才会通上一两通奢侈的长途电话。我总是一遍又一遍读着你的来信,看着你诙谐的漫画,分享着你在外生活的点点滴滴。蓦然发觉,自己是多么地想念着你。想念你阳光的笑容,想念你温暖的大手,想念和你一起度过的美好时光。曾经许诺的友情,在那一刻,渐渐起了变化。终于按捺不住,在一通电话里,我问你还当我是妹妹吗?你没有回答,只是饶有深意地说很快我就会知道答案了。那是一个飘着圣诞乐得12月。天使没有来报佳音,却把你给带走了。你的室友说不晓得为何那天下午你执意要骑车出去,要不然你也不会出事。你习佛多年的妈妈,悲伤地诉说,应该是天意吧你原本打算前天回家乡过节却因为临时有事情要办所以延后行程!我望着你的照片,你的笑容依旧灿烂,充满着朝气,不敢相信你已经永远睡去。我以为再也不会知道你的答案,直到收到那一张圣诞卡。信封上是我熟悉的你的字迹。拆开后,卡片的封面是一片白皑皑的雪地,一个胖胖的雪人正对着我笑弯弯。打开内页,耳边响起了“白色圣诞”。我的眼泪簌簌地往下落,落在衣襟上,卡片上,沾湿了你俊秀的字迹。那是你的答案, 只有区区8个字。
“我喜欢你,圣诞快乐!”

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Attitude does matter

I was trying very hard to hold my laughter back after hearing those conversations. While i was in the queue for ordering in McD last Saturday, there's a lady behind me, dressed up in all branded clothes carrying a LV handbag. It was crowded because this McD located along the KL-Seremban and it was lunch hour. Moreover, the following Monday was Hari Raya Haji therefore quite a lot of people travelled back their hometown. Though it was crowded and the queue was long but there was only 2 counter for ordering. We waited and waited, patiently. I overheard the conversation between the LV bag lady with her family. I guess they are Singaporean from their accent. Then, the following incident supported my prediction. I was at the counter waiting to collect my food after i placed my order. The McD worker was a Malay guy. He asked the lady behind me for order, in Malay. The lady was blank at first, then she quickly placed her order in English. She was ordering Mcvalue set. Then the story began...
"Besar atau sederhana?"
"Huh?"
"Besar atau sederhana?"
"What?"
I was trying to help so i butt in.
"He is asking whether you'd like to have a medium or large Mcvalue set." I said.
"There is only one size for Mcvalue set." The lady replied.
'We have two sizes here." i replied.
"Got two sizes meh?"She asked again.
'There's only one size lar." She insisted.
Then i kept quiet, trying so hard not to laugh or to say TNS. The long queue behind her started to make noise. Then the man behind her, spoke.
"There might be only one size in Singapore but here is Malaysia."
And the man is her husband.
So she finally accepted that there were two sizes for Mcvalue set in Malaysia.
I saw relief faces behind her, as everyone was trying to fill their empty stomach so eagerly.
Do we need to be that particular?
Maybe the people from advance country do.
Then on the way back, i stopped at the Restoren jejantas for a break. Andrew went to reload his touch-n-g0 while i was waiting in the car. There's no parking so i just parked at the roadside while waiting. Then i saw a Toyota Wish, slowed down beside my car. If you have been to the Restoren jejantas you may imagine the floor plan. At both sides are the parking, then the cars waiting (such as mine), park behind the cars in the car parks. So the middle lane is spacious for other cars to pass by. But this Toyota Wish, blocked the middle lane. At first i thought it was waiting for the carpark cos it's giving left signal. I was ready to remove my car if i blocked any cars coming out. But after 5 minutes, nothing happened. No car was coming out. The the cars behind the Toyota Wish were bypassing it carefully. There's room enough to fit a bus in front of my car for the Toyota Wish to park if it wanted to do so. But it prefer to stay in the middle and blocking every car. To my surprise, for every 10 cars passing by, only 2 honked at it. Then i started to praise how polite and patience our people have become. If the same situation happened in KL, or PJ, your mirror might break due to the nonstop high-pitch honking noise + uncountable middle fingers and f**ks. Suddenly the Toyota started to reverse. I wondered what it was trying to do then i saw there was a car coming out from the carpark at its right hand site about 2 cars away from it. Yes. It was trying to get that carpark. OMG! make sense lar please. This is one-way lane. There's long queue of cars behind it and it still wanted to reverse. Okay never mind u can do it if no car is waiting for the carpark. But actually, there's a car waiting for the parking, right behind it, giving the right hand signal. Furthermore, the Toyota was still giving the left-signal! I really beh tahan this driver's attitude. I looked through the windows, the driver was a man, with a lady besides him i guess his wife and somebody sitting at the back, i think his children. Of course, he failed to get the parking. Then he moved his car forward and stopped right in front of me which led me a chance to look at the car no plate. Not to my surprise, it started with a S. Perhaps the cars behind had lost their patience and started honking. Then only he drove away slowly. What a selfish driver!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

火,熊熊的烧。

今天凌晨一时许,我还在看书,忽然听到一阵阵像是倒沙石,又像是玻璃破裂的声音。我还以为邻家进贼,往窗外看去,却没看到任何可疑人物。我心想可能是外面的大街在修路吧!可是这声音越来越响,我也开始嗅到烧焦味。再往窗外看去,天空隐约有火光。当时第一个念头,就想到失火了。我赶紧跑出门外探个究竟。只见对面的房子被火光映的通红,空气中弥漫着强烈的烧焦味。原来是对街的家私城失火了。熊熊大火吞噬着至少6间展列室,火光映红了凌晨的天空,伴随着滚滚浓烟。刚才听到的声音,原来是展列室的橱窗玻璃承受不了高温而破裂的声音。邻居们都聚集在路口议论纷纷,担心火势会蔓延到对街来。忽然有人说:“家私城隔壁不是有一个油站吗?会不会烧到那边呀?”大家更加忧心忡忡了。风势助长了火势的蔓延,转眼整列展列室便没入了火光之中。虽然隔了4个车道,我仍能感觉到大火所散发的高温。消防车陆续抵达。警察开始封路以便救火。面对这凶猛的火势,消防员那一道道水柱根本发挥不了任何作用,只能眼睁睁看着火舌狂舞。终于在烧完全部能烧的东西后(至少我是这么觉得),火势慢慢转弱了。此时消防员的水柱也发挥功效,努力的扑灭余火。短短的一个小时,整列展列室便成了废墟。幸好并没造成任何人命伤亡 (这也是听说的)。到现在想起这场骇人的火灾,仍然心有余悸。






Friday, November 28, 2008

找死的兔子


神智不清的兔子,活得不耐烦了,千方百计去寻死。自杀的方式标新立异,层出不穷,爆笑疯狂。 有故意拿弹弓射蜜蜂窝被蜜蜂蜇死的,有待在快断裂的尖锐的钟乳石下等死的,有躲在茶壶里等着被沸水烫死的,有把手镏弹绑在回力棒上的,有带剪刀去玩高空弹跳的。。。决对让你从忍悛不住到狂笑不止然后笑到上气不接下气!Andy Riley 这本原名 《The Book of Bunny Suicides》的书,会让沮丧压抑的你,精神一振,通体舒畅,鸟气全消,捧腹大笑!


幸福
是相信一个人的美好
美好
是无怨无悔的付出
付出
是寻找快乐的等待
等待
是一生最初的苍老

Thursday, November 27, 2008

窗外有蓝天


踏出GSO 的大门,心情很低落。习惯性的抬头寻找一片蓝,却失望了。天空灰沉沉的,乌云密布,眼看就快下雨了。我加快脚步走向车子。才刚钻进车厢,雨就劈哩啪啦的落下来了。豆大的雨点打在车镜上,密密集集地渐渐汇成一道道的水迹。鼻头酸酸的,很努力克制着想哭的冲动。耳边响起了刚才的对话。
“We have not yet received the renomination from your faculty. That’s why your thesis is not sent out.”
“What? Do you mean that my thesis has been sitting on your desk for the past 5 months?”
“Yes.”
原来我白等了5个月。
“but my supervisor has submitted the new examiners list three months ago.”
“I don’t know. We haven’t receive anything yet. I’m still waiting for the feedback from your faculty.”
“Can anyone tell me what’s wrong now?My supervisor reassures me that she has sent the report, long long time ago. But you said you didn’t receive it. Has the letter gone missing? Or the bugs eat it up?”
“I’ll check with your faculty again.”
“when can I get the answer?”
“………..”
“can I have a date?”
“I’m not sure……..”
“How long do I have to wait?”
“…………….”
“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“next week.”
“Then I’ll call you next week.”
有没有搞错?太离谱了吧!我可怜的论文经过漫长的5个月竟然还没被送出去批改。我到底得罪了谁嘛你们要这样对我?难道真的要我从交论文那一刻起就得天天拨打夺命追魂call你们才会把问题解决吗?都怪自己错信了人。都怪自己太大意了。
“这不是你的错。相信别人是一种美德。”
怎么会在最沮丧的时候想起你?
“来嘛。。。笑一笑。。。别紧绷着脸,问题终会有解决的时候。”
对。这种制度下产生的问题与人为的疏忽存在已久。我也不想再去追究谁该负责,只想要快点解决问题。
“当你无法在相信别人时,就必须相信自己,”
只能靠自己了。
窗外的雨势渐渐转小,我把车开往学院的行政楼。在被人指上指下,如球般被踢来踢去后,终算有了点头绪。拨了通电话给指导教授,简略地说明了问题所在,也再度向她确认新的名单。她的反应比我还激烈。嘿!该生气的人是我吧!反而还得听她发牢骚。真的很无奈。
“心情不好时,看看窗外吧!” 你曾经说过。
走出行政楼,雨已停了。雨过天晴的天空,蓝得特别清澈。

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

让我想一想


第N次的分手
我们重复说着
同样的语调
同样的表情
同样的理由
以为练习了N次
已经免疫
为什么眼泪还是掉了下来
心还是会痛?

Saturday, November 15, 2008

马克笔大对决

狂风暴雨的午后,赴了一场马克笔大对决。两大高手过招,没有金钟罩铁布衫,只有温馨的童话。能亲眼目睹久仰大名的抽屉小姐作画,已兴奋无比。没想到之后还能和诸位画家作家同台吃拉面,更有幸坐在抽屉的旁边,与她近距离接触! 最近的距离,只有2公分,在我的左手与她绘画的右 手之间,仿佛是一场梦!



大决斗现场

两大高手一致的笑容

开始的时候是一片空百

半边人对决线条人。还有围观者。

还有架势不输两大高手的小画家。

还有未来手提包设计家的独立人仕。


时间结束了还画得无法自拔的两人。
完成的作品

右手拿笔,左手拿麦克风的龚万辉。

画画很棒的人有修长的手指

画画很棒的人都有修长的手指。



Thursday, November 13, 2008

勇气


能不能
给我一点儿勇气
大声地告诉你
“我全都不在乎了!”
给我一点儿勇气
能不能

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

你快乐,所以我快乐。



没有满天璀璨的烟火,
没有浪漫的摇晃烛光,
没有鲜艳欲滴的花朵,
也没有动人的旋律。
在人声沸腾的烤肉店里,
冉冉上升的白烟之间,
我看到了,
你的微笑。